Hello there.
I haven't written in a few days because I have been very very tired. Fatigue is another common sympton of Fibromyalgia. I was at the grocery store today and while standing in the checkout I barely could stay on my feet, never mind stay awake.
Even with the walk home, I was exhausted when I got back. It's sort of like this feeling that overtakes me all of a sudden and I have to close my eyes and sleep. That, or take all of my energy to fight it off. I came home and had a nap for about 45 minutes and then woke up again.
I have felt tired all day even since then. I think it is stress that causes the fatigue to overcome me. As much as I try to take it one step at a time, it's hard to turn my mind off without the meds. Fortunately they work well for that and I try to get the sleep that I think I need. Often I sleep and then wake up just as tired as I was before so it doesn't help that much.
As a result, I tend to stay near home in case I get over tired and have to close my eyes. That is ok with me though, because I like to stay at home or near it. Well I am tired now so I will leave this note for the day and see how I am tomorrow.
Enjoy. Twila :)
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Widespread Pain
Hi, well I think this symptom is pretty much a standard for Fibromyalgia. Widespread Hmmm. I know there are certain trigger points that help to diagnose Fibro but I think it would be a shorter list to state where it doesn't hurt. I put it so far back in my mind most days (except the stabbing pain which I can't ignore) that I don't even notice the ongoing pain until someone asks me how I am.
I think about it for a minute and realize that there are about 4 spots on my body that hurt on a continual basis. Par for the course is what I say. Lately it is my wrists and that could be very interruptive to my lifestyle since I use my wrists a lot to type.
I have pain meds but I really don't want to take them on a daily basis so I don't take them every day. The quick stabbing pain I get, I can sort of deal with. At first it was harder. Now though the pain lingers for about 15 seconds instead of 3 or 4 seconds. I know it doesn't sound long but if you remember burning yourself, you know how each second seems like forever. So these days I am just getting used to this new pain and then length of it.
It could easily be stress related and maybe when my son is doing better and my daughter's life settles down, it will be a bit better. I will have to wait and see. It will be about a month before I know for sure how things will be.
So for now, it's late as usual and I have taken my med so it is time to sleep. Good night for today.
Twila
I think about it for a minute and realize that there are about 4 spots on my body that hurt on a continual basis. Par for the course is what I say. Lately it is my wrists and that could be very interruptive to my lifestyle since I use my wrists a lot to type.
I have pain meds but I really don't want to take them on a daily basis so I don't take them every day. The quick stabbing pain I get, I can sort of deal with. At first it was harder. Now though the pain lingers for about 15 seconds instead of 3 or 4 seconds. I know it doesn't sound long but if you remember burning yourself, you know how each second seems like forever. So these days I am just getting used to this new pain and then length of it.
It could easily be stress related and maybe when my son is doing better and my daughter's life settles down, it will be a bit better. I will have to wait and see. It will be about a month before I know for sure how things will be.
So for now, it's late as usual and I have taken my med so it is time to sleep. Good night for today.
Twila
Monday, October 8, 2007
Anxiety
Good morning. Hey guess what? I didn't know that anxiety was one of the symptoms of Fibromyalgia but it is. I have been prone to anxiety attacks my whole life so I just thought Fibro symptoms were something I could add to the plate.
I remember the doctor asked me, years ago, if I was anxious on a day to day basis. My answer was, "compared to................?". I didn't know what to compare my normal state of mind to what he called anxious. I think I am anxious almost all of the time but certain things spike my anxiety level to a degree that I actually notice it.
I still am not sure what high anxiety is. I mean, besides not being able to breath and crying so hard that I can't get out any more than the first sound of a word. I guess that is high anxiety. Does anxiety cause phobias or do phobias cause anxiety? That question I would like to have answered one day. Maybe it is just the anticipation of the phobia manifesting itself which causes anxiety. I am still not sure, even to this day.
Well I am famous for looking up the definition of a word and then applying it to myself. The dictionary says "painful uneasiness of mind over an anticipated event" or "abnormal apprehension and fear often accompanied by physiological signs, by doubt about the nature and reality of the threat itself, and by self-doubt". So, did I hit the nail on the head or what? I had a good guess. lololol That being the case I would like someone to clarify what normal apprehension looks like vs abnormal.
Well definition 1 sounds like it would fall under the phobia umbrella but maybe they are closely linked. None the less, one follows the other. Some days I am not even sure which feeling is the leader and which is the follower.
Let me list things I am apprehensive about then. (For me it's normal apprehension but compared to...................?) I think most of these things are things everyone is apprehensive about but I could be wrong. lolol Well, 1) going out of my confort zone physically in case something should go wrong. Like, I don't know, getting lost maybe............... (memory loss). 2) Worrying, and many things can fall under that category. Even though I know God says not to worry because he takes care of all his creatures, even the birds. Hmmm Maybe if I was a bird I wouldn't have such anxiety. :)
But seriously, I know God is taking care of me, but in an anxious state, it seems to easily slip my mind. 3) I think of things that cause me anxiety and I keep going back to phobias so this is a tough excersize I have created for myself here. Oh, Oh, yes, answering a question wrong, in a public setting or confidently answering a question (let's say in an interactive church setting) only to find out that that is no where near what the pastor had in mind. Is that anxiety or a phobia? 4) Being asked to do something that I am not familiar with, hence the chances of failing are very high. Well I managed to come up with 4. Not bad for 6:30 am AND doing an excersize I had not originally intended to do. That's ok, maybe that's part of having a blog; asking yourself the tough questions.
On that note I will close. I don't like to drag on for a long time and lose your interest. :) I will write more again either later or tomorrow. Hey for all you Canadians HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!
I remember the doctor asked me, years ago, if I was anxious on a day to day basis. My answer was, "compared to................?". I didn't know what to compare my normal state of mind to what he called anxious. I think I am anxious almost all of the time but certain things spike my anxiety level to a degree that I actually notice it.
I still am not sure what high anxiety is. I mean, besides not being able to breath and crying so hard that I can't get out any more than the first sound of a word. I guess that is high anxiety. Does anxiety cause phobias or do phobias cause anxiety? That question I would like to have answered one day. Maybe it is just the anticipation of the phobia manifesting itself which causes anxiety. I am still not sure, even to this day.
Well I am famous for looking up the definition of a word and then applying it to myself. The dictionary says "painful uneasiness of mind over an anticipated event" or "abnormal apprehension and fear often accompanied by physiological signs, by doubt about the nature and reality of the threat itself, and by self-doubt". So, did I hit the nail on the head or what? I had a good guess. lololol That being the case I would like someone to clarify what normal apprehension looks like vs abnormal.
Well definition 1 sounds like it would fall under the phobia umbrella but maybe they are closely linked. None the less, one follows the other. Some days I am not even sure which feeling is the leader and which is the follower.
Let me list things I am apprehensive about then. (For me it's normal apprehension but compared to...................?) I think most of these things are things everyone is apprehensive about but I could be wrong. lolol Well, 1) going out of my confort zone physically in case something should go wrong. Like, I don't know, getting lost maybe............... (memory loss). 2) Worrying, and many things can fall under that category. Even though I know God says not to worry because he takes care of all his creatures, even the birds. Hmmm Maybe if I was a bird I wouldn't have such anxiety. :)
But seriously, I know God is taking care of me, but in an anxious state, it seems to easily slip my mind. 3) I think of things that cause me anxiety and I keep going back to phobias so this is a tough excersize I have created for myself here. Oh, Oh, yes, answering a question wrong, in a public setting or confidently answering a question (let's say in an interactive church setting) only to find out that that is no where near what the pastor had in mind. Is that anxiety or a phobia? 4) Being asked to do something that I am not familiar with, hence the chances of failing are very high. Well I managed to come up with 4. Not bad for 6:30 am AND doing an excersize I had not originally intended to do. That's ok, maybe that's part of having a blog; asking yourself the tough questions.
On that note I will close. I don't like to drag on for a long time and lose your interest. :) I will write more again either later or tomorrow. Hey for all you Canadians HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!
Friday, October 5, 2007
Sleep Disorders
Hello
Well it is the typical 2 am and I am waiting for my sleeping meds to take affect. A very very commen syptom of Fibro is the inability to fall asleep and to stay asleep. Having a good nights rest is important for your body to heal. Sleep levels have to reach levels 3 and 4 in order for your body to repair itself and get enough rest. For me, without the help of sleep medications, I actually don't get sleepy at all. That could be from years and years of working graveyard shift. I am not sure yet. None the less, without help I find myself watching the sun some up in the morning.
Also it is a very common for people with Fibromyalgia to have RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) which causes leg twitches so bad that falling asleep is not an option. If feels like someone is twisting a rubber band inside your legs and then all of a sudden it lets go and your legs (sometimes arms) suddenly twitch and IF you happen to be close to sleeping, it wakes you up. The cycle then starts all over again. There are very good medications that your doctor can give you that will stop that pattern from happening and help you get a good nights sleep.
I am not working anymore but I think my body never got used to sleeping normal hours and then add in the fact that my mind won't stop once I lay my head down. Hitting the pillow seems to be a trigger for my brain to become as active as it can. lol It goes over the days events, the months events, and in my case the events on the news and can not find a way to relax and fall asleep. I am very grateful for the meds that I have that help me to sleep. If you get the same results from natural teas or the like, then that is awesome too. Whatever works.
I take my meds about 11 pm if I am not out doing something and they take about an hour to take affect. My med seems to fix both the RLS and the mind racing all at the same time.
Well speaking of........... it's now 2 am and maybe I should try and sleep. I did a few pages of my scrapbooking hobbie so time to lay down and let the T.V. put me to sleep.
Have a wonderful day tomorrow and hope it doesn't rain where you live.
Twila :)
Well it is the typical 2 am and I am waiting for my sleeping meds to take affect. A very very commen syptom of Fibro is the inability to fall asleep and to stay asleep. Having a good nights rest is important for your body to heal. Sleep levels have to reach levels 3 and 4 in order for your body to repair itself and get enough rest. For me, without the help of sleep medications, I actually don't get sleepy at all. That could be from years and years of working graveyard shift. I am not sure yet. None the less, without help I find myself watching the sun some up in the morning.
Also it is a very common for people with Fibromyalgia to have RLS (Restless Leg Syndrome) which causes leg twitches so bad that falling asleep is not an option. If feels like someone is twisting a rubber band inside your legs and then all of a sudden it lets go and your legs (sometimes arms) suddenly twitch and IF you happen to be close to sleeping, it wakes you up. The cycle then starts all over again. There are very good medications that your doctor can give you that will stop that pattern from happening and help you get a good nights sleep.
I am not working anymore but I think my body never got used to sleeping normal hours and then add in the fact that my mind won't stop once I lay my head down. Hitting the pillow seems to be a trigger for my brain to become as active as it can. lol It goes over the days events, the months events, and in my case the events on the news and can not find a way to relax and fall asleep. I am very grateful for the meds that I have that help me to sleep. If you get the same results from natural teas or the like, then that is awesome too. Whatever works.
I take my meds about 11 pm if I am not out doing something and they take about an hour to take affect. My med seems to fix both the RLS and the mind racing all at the same time.
Well speaking of........... it's now 2 am and maybe I should try and sleep. I did a few pages of my scrapbooking hobbie so time to lay down and let the T.V. put me to sleep.
Have a wonderful day tomorrow and hope it doesn't rain where you live.
Twila :)
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Those pesky stabbing pains
Hello
Today is Wednesday and it has been an interesting day. The first half went ok because there was a bible study. Then the next half I spent sleeping. The last half was going fine until the stabbing pains began. People wonder what the cause of these are.
Well for me it's the wind or cold drafts. They are really starting to become a nuisance to me. They affect my every day life. I have a back pack that I bring with me everywhere and it contains my "survival gear". LOLOL I carry my slippers for my feet, ankle warmers for my ankles, wrist bands for my wrists, and usually a sweater. Sounds like a suitcase hey?
My granddaughter laughs because she says my body can tell us what the weather is going to be like. That seems to be the only symptom, so far, that I have found that is similiar with arthritis.
So, I will keep this short because that's my attention span this evening. Thanks to those reading this blog and I hope it helps.
Twila
(I had a comment from someone for this post but unfortunately it is in a language that I can not read so I can't post it. Thankyou though, to all those who read my blog)
Today is Wednesday and it has been an interesting day. The first half went ok because there was a bible study. Then the next half I spent sleeping. The last half was going fine until the stabbing pains began. People wonder what the cause of these are.
Well for me it's the wind or cold drafts. They are really starting to become a nuisance to me. They affect my every day life. I have a back pack that I bring with me everywhere and it contains my "survival gear". LOLOL I carry my slippers for my feet, ankle warmers for my ankles, wrist bands for my wrists, and usually a sweater. Sounds like a suitcase hey?
My granddaughter laughs because she says my body can tell us what the weather is going to be like. That seems to be the only symptom, so far, that I have found that is similiar with arthritis.
So, I will keep this short because that's my attention span this evening. Thanks to those reading this blog and I hope it helps.
Twila
(I had a comment from someone for this post but unfortunately it is in a language that I can not read so I can't post it. Thankyou though, to all those who read my blog)
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
New Day Migraine Free
Hello, today is Oct 2 and I think the headaches are gone. I haven't posted on here for some days since I wasn't feeling very well. It is very difficult to have a stress free day, never mind life. I don't think I took as many meds ever as I have taken in the last 2 days. It gets very hard to remain positive at times like that but I am hoping that as the days without headaches continue I can rebuild my faith. I pray on a continual basis but hey let's be honest. When your head is pounding and even crying makes it worse, a person kind of wonders if those prayers are going into thin air.
I heard someone the other day say that God never gives a person more than they can deal with. Well, the people that know me should all send God a little prayer and let him know that I am at my max now. :) I think God gives me entirely too much credit for what I can bare.
Speaking of prayer which I do on a regular basis. I have been asking myself that if I become closer to God, does that tick off the dark spirits and so since they can't attack me, they go after my children? It's a valid question I think. I have been pondering that for a few days now since my son is having such intense difficulties. If that is the case, what is the response to that? Do I quit praying? Do I quit studying and getting closer to God through Jesus, or do I stay stubborn and continue on my path? I haven't answered that question yet for myself.
When I watch my children's world's fall apart, or at least get turned upside down, I tend to get a bit stressed out. This particular thread may not have a direct relation to Fibromyalgia but that's whats on my mind the last few days. I wanted to write every day on here but just didn't have the energy. Hopefully now I can get back on track as I work through those questions and find some answers.
I heard someone the other day say that God never gives a person more than they can deal with. Well, the people that know me should all send God a little prayer and let him know that I am at my max now. :) I think God gives me entirely too much credit for what I can bare.
Speaking of prayer which I do on a regular basis. I have been asking myself that if I become closer to God, does that tick off the dark spirits and so since they can't attack me, they go after my children? It's a valid question I think. I have been pondering that for a few days now since my son is having such intense difficulties. If that is the case, what is the response to that? Do I quit praying? Do I quit studying and getting closer to God through Jesus, or do I stay stubborn and continue on my path? I haven't answered that question yet for myself.
When I watch my children's world's fall apart, or at least get turned upside down, I tend to get a bit stressed out. This particular thread may not have a direct relation to Fibromyalgia but that's whats on my mind the last few days. I wanted to write every day on here but just didn't have the energy. Hopefully now I can get back on track as I work through those questions and find some answers.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
A little about Depression
Hello. I haven't written for a few days. Sorry about that. Depression is another very, very common side affect of Fibromyalgia. I think some depression comes from the loss of the independance that I once knew. Maybe it's the constant pain that gets me down after a while. Oh I try and stay positve and when I am out and around people I generally do alright. It's the nights and days when I am by myself when I feel free to cry and cry. I am not even exactly sure why I am crying except that there is an intense loss in my life. I have always been a very independant person and it is difficult to give that up.
My doctor says that realistically I will never work again so that by itself is a loss. Once the depression takes hold though, it's tough to talk about. I tend to think that people don't want to hear me "whin" about my problems. I also don't want to push my friends away because I am not the cheerful person that most people, I think would prefer.
I take medication for depression, as well as other disorders. I think the meds help me not to sink so low into the depressive state that I will never come out of it again.
I am going away for 4 days to the doctor to update my precriptions and get checked out. I will see if I can do a blog day for one of the days that I will be gone. I leave the night of the 25th and come back the night of the 27th. I guess that is only 2 days.
Well it's late where I am. I just wanted to post in case someone was checking back to see a new update.
Twila :)
My doctor says that realistically I will never work again so that by itself is a loss. Once the depression takes hold though, it's tough to talk about. I tend to think that people don't want to hear me "whin" about my problems. I also don't want to push my friends away because I am not the cheerful person that most people, I think would prefer.
I take medication for depression, as well as other disorders. I think the meds help me not to sink so low into the depressive state that I will never come out of it again.
I am going away for 4 days to the doctor to update my precriptions and get checked out. I will see if I can do a blog day for one of the days that I will be gone. I leave the night of the 25th and come back the night of the 27th. I guess that is only 2 days.
Well it's late where I am. I just wanted to post in case someone was checking back to see a new update.
Twila :)
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